Parenting Is Like Basketball

After some of last night's tragic basketball losses in the Sweet 16 attributed (in my opinion) to horrible coaching, I was inspired to write about the not to sweet things that accompany raising an asshole, that is if you don't discipline your child. And while the joys of parenthood can certainly outweigh the cons, I write this because I've witnessed countless acts of terrible parenting such as the video referenced above.  Now as outsiders looking in, we don't always see potential underlying issues, behavioral problems, etc. that face parents. But I am not speaking to those exceptions. I am writing about the parents that reward bad behavior and wonder why their kid grows up to be useless, when all along they ignored or failed to punish behaviors like the child in the video.  The child you're raising and believe is so elite, is mimicking your poor behavior, while also not being disciplined for their actions. I relate the video to an instance where I held the door open with my foot for two women, while maneuvering my stroller out with my right hand and holding another child's hand in the left. I was shell shocked that two adult women would walk through the door I was struggling to prop open, with kids and stroller in tow, as opposed to assisting me. All I could think is that most asshole kids exist because of asshole parents!

Now you're probably wondering how I related basketball to this. Well just as some of the teams lost last night due to bad coaching, in the spirit of the NCAA Tournament and my responsibility not to raise an jerk, I leave you with an elite 8 lessons I learned in basketball, and how I believe they are life lessons to teach your little monster to avoid losing the game...of life.

• Parenthood (and basketball) takes a team to be successful. There's truth to the saying "It takes a village," because regardless of whether you're a single parent, married, etc., there will always be teachers, family, friends -- others -- around that will influence and contribute to the success or lack thereof your child. Make those relationships count.
• As parents (and in basketball) you must learn the basics and fundamentals to be successful. Although there is no perfect tell-all manual to raising children and the best learning experience is hands-on, in order to develop the skill needed, you have to be willing to equip yourself with knowledge via study, reading, speaking with others, etc. You must establish the needs of the life you brought into the world, and how to nurture your mini-me in attaining life goals. Your success is their success and vice verse.  
• Be prepared mentally and physically. We all have our ups and downs in life, and especially in raising kids because we don't have all the answers, and child-rearing is exhausting. That's why it's crucial to utilize all resources to find answers to your questions and concerns. Additionally, the demands of parenthood are 24/7, so one has to be mentally and physically tough. Exercise your body and mind. Physical exercise will do both in relieving and exerting stress, while building endurance, and energizing. Preparing both mental and physical is essential to winning in life. 
• Be alert and anticipate. In basketball, court vision is critical to winning games. Seeing both the man you're guarding and the ball allows a player to be active rather than reactive. The same goes for parenting. If you are alert about your child's feelings, needs, and wants, it will allow you to anticipate their needs and desires. Being closely involved and aware -- not necessarily overbearing and controlling -- are factors that can foster an amazing open relationship that sets the stage for achievement.
• If your style (game plan) is not working, re-adjust it, re-adjust it again, and again if need be. Parenthood is challenging, and if something isn't working, you have to change tactics until something works in order to be successful. 
• Never give up. You cannot win if you don't try. 
• We can't always win, but if you give it your best shot, and implement what you learn along the way, then you are victorious. 
• I leave you with the last of my elite 8 lessons which is a quote from no other than Rosie Perez, from the awesome basketball movie White Men Can't Jump! "Sometimes when you win, you really lose, and sometimes when you lose, you really win. And sometimes when you win or lose, you actually tie. And sometimes when you tie, you actually win or lose. Winning or losing is one organic mechanism from which one extracts what one needs." 

-OzzyMommy

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