Schools are Nuts

I'll say it. Fire all the nuts that implemented a peanut free rule. As a parent that grew up eating peanut butter in schools and at home (as I'm sure most of us parents are), I think its a load of nonsense to impose a universal policy as a result of a few. I am writing this blog in the wake of the recent lunch shaming incident, where a mother packed Oreo Cookies in her pre-school daughter's lunch, only to find the cookies returned with a nasty-gram from the school telling mom that they only allow healthy food items for the kids. This infuriates me, because as a mom constantly in a pinch to run errands, if I only had a few items to put in my daughter's lunchbox (i.e. before my grocery run to the store), then I would have done the same. I mean, I guess I could make her a peanut butter and jelly sandwich, except that nuts aren't allowed in most schools anymore either. So now because of other kids'  allergies, my daughter can't eat peanut products, and because more than half of America is overweight, my lean daughter (who could stand to put on a few pounds) also can't bring cookies?!! What a joke!

Why should other kids'  allergies and weight problems be mine? If schools are going to impose such strict requirements based upon a few, then the districts should provide the option of free lunch to everyone, so they can regiment what the child consumes. Odds are the allergic and overweight kids aren't eating all that healthy out of school, particularly if they have all these dietary restrictions, which I consider issues anyway. I'm no doctor but say the reason kids today have so many allergies is due to lack of exposure. I'm no parenting expert, but it annoys me when at the first sign of a kid not liking or perhaps having a less than great experience with something, "Maybe s/he's allergic." Well maybe as parents we should slowly introduce the food(s) to build immunity and tolerance, as opposed to allowing them to be allergic (yes I said allowing them to be allergic). If I left it up to doctors (many who love to diagnose something over nothing), my daughter would be allergic to peanuts, seafood, grass, pets, and lactose intolerant. Guess what? I slowly continued to introduce the items, and ironically she loves them all, eats them regularly, and what a miracle, she's no longer "allergic" to any of them. We live in a society where pills and allergy medications are handed out like candy, and quite frankly, it's the reason people are so unhealthy in America. It's nuts…actually I'm saying it's not nuts…you get what I'm saying!


Why should healthy and thin to average weight kids have to modify their diets and lunches to accommodate the unhealthy kids? Why should a staple like peanut butter and various other nut products, also considered the source of countless health benefits, be banned from schools on account of a few? It seems counterproductive. It's kind of like the overweight co-worker that tells everyone how much they workout and are dieting, but she never loses an ounce and you're certain the foods she brings to work aren't close to the calories she's packing on at home when no one is watching. Schools feeding into these "allergies" and accommodating the kids with countless dietary restrictions is harming them. How will we ever build up a tolerance and immunity to truly be healthy? How will kids experience diets that include an array of foods and flavors? Schools accommodating the few will not change what the child eats at home. Genetics play a part in health, but parents and lifestyle play an even bigger part. I can assure you that stopping the fat kids from eating a few cookies at school will have no bearing on the bags of chips, soda, and cookies they eat when the get home.  If schools will not offer free lunches to my child to ensure the meals I pack meet school standards to counter the ludicrous standards they have to accommodate the allergy ridden and overweight children, then I should be able to pack whatever the hell I want my child to eat. I'm paying for it. It's not my fault that some kids are overweight or in the school's terms, "unhealthy." It's not my fault that some kids have allergies. Call me insensitive, but I cannot for the life of me understand why an entire school chooses to modify such dietary standards for the few.

And with that, I'll digress and randomly say thank you to the few allergy ridden folks that ruined me getting free peanuts on the airplane! #OnlyinAmerica

-OzzyMommy

Please email ozzy@ozzybaby.com or check out our website ozzybaby.com

The Spanking Seen Around the World

Click This Link #ToughLove

There are mixed reviews that accompany this video seen around the world. An angry Baltimore mom is smacking around her son, after seeing him on television throwing rocks at police, involving himself in the riots. Some parents are calling the mother a hero with hashtags like #MomoftheYear, #ToughLove to #GoodParenting, while others claim this is the very example that led her son to committing violent acts. Some parents believe in physical punishment, but the real question is what are you teaching your child? Is this form of punishment appropriate?

Let me first say that I am appalled at the rioting in Baltimore, as well as the destruction throughout America in an effort "to gain justice" as a result of the injustices. Destruction is counterproductive. What's the point of attending these rallies when everyone can see the fights brewing?  Countless people -- our children -- are gathering in the streets to make a less than productive statement, and I think the first step in the right direction is this mom, who has paved the way for other parents to get out there and snatch their kids out of the streets, because an eye for an eye will absolutely leave the world blind. People are destroying their own communities. Rioting to "seek justice" for a man (Freddie Gray) they did not know, all while participating in countless injustices to so many other people you don't know?  Innocent victims are now batting homelessness, unemployment, and injuries because of the havoc. In my opinion, the only thing good that's come out of this Baltimore riot is the mom in the video. She's sending a wake-up call to America that screams, parents take control.

Over the years in watching friends raise their kids, to comparing my parenting style to others and my own parents, I think there is a fine line in what works and what doesn't. Because every child and parent is different, I believe the forms of discipline have to vary for each kid, because physical discipline (which I believe in) does not work in every case. Consequences are key, and knowing your child's personality and getting to the root cause of their misbehavior allows a parent to make a commitment to the discipline, and sets a precedent that the child should understand. Certainly there are situations when a parent loses their cool. But we have to ask ourselves, what lesson is learned in losing control? Now I will say that this video sends a powerful message, and although we can't always control our children's actions (particularly in this scenario where the child appears to be an adult), I agree with this mom losing her cool, because it may save her son's life; she may have prevented him from being shot by the police for his stupid behavior, injured, or arrested. Perhaps her actions did not help at all. As Baltimore Police urge parents to locate their children and get them home, despite this video showcasing a less than perfect scenario, this mom is trying to get her son home by all means necessary.  In my opinion, a good parent does whatever they can to protect their child. If that means physically kicking their butt up and down the street to get them in the house for their own safety and to avoid them ruining their life or worse, having to attend your child's funeral, then sign me up every time. No parent wants their child to be a victim of the streets, and for that reason, I say #KudosBaltimoreMom.

Please share your thoughts at ozzy@ozzybaby.com or visit our website ozzybaby.com

-OzzyMommy

Beefing Over Babysitters

So I didn't realize that asking other moms for babysitter referrals, is like asking for government secrets! Moms in Kansas City (and maybe this is everywhere) covet their babysitters like a winning Powerball ticket, and I am realizing that I may need to take a few classes in torture tactics, in order to obtain the information I need!!! I've also noticed how annoyed moms get after referring their sitter, when they find out we've used her to sit on more than one occasion. I didn't realize you imposed a one-time only rule. Guess I better review babysitter etiquette 101.

So our regular babysitter broke her ankle last week and will be on crutches, so we were scrambling the day before our planned date night, to get a replacement sitter. In addition to exhausting our rolodex of back-up sitters who were either already committed to other families, or simply unavailable, we reluctantly decided to consider Care.com. Now I understand that pricing varies from place to place, is based upon education and experience, varies with age (both the sitter and children) and the # of kids. What I've not been able to wrap my head around is that you want me to pay you $15/hour to watch my tv, use my internet, and you have unlimited access to our fridge while my baby sleeps for half of your shift?!! Call me cheap, but you're really only working 3 out of 4 of your 8 hour shift. Our regular babysitter is in her 40's, works at an elementary school, is married and has 3 kids of her own, yet only charges $10/hour. She's wonderful and clearly qualified, and was referred by a close friend and co-worker, so why on earth would I pay the 21-year-old stranger $15/hour?!

As my husband and I are screening the applicants and we're becoming more and more shocked with some of the less than desirables charging higher rates, we find a gal with approved background check, an MBA in child development, and after interviewing her found out that she lives right around the corner. The best part of this situation is getting her to agree from $15/hr to $10. Everything's negotiable, and needless to say, she turned out to be a wonderful back-up sitter we will use again. The moral of this story 1. Babysitter pricing these days is outrageous 2. Moms, stop hoarding your babysitters 3. Care.com is an awesome site!

Sincerely,

-OzzyMommy

Visit our website ozzybaby.com

He Needs More Time to Gel His Hair

My husband will probably kill me for writing this, but I couldn't help myself!

So first and foremost, thank you to my husband for working from home this morning, so that I could attend a women's luncheon that ran longer than we thought. And because it ran longer than expected, we had to do a parking lot baby exchange so he'd make his 2 o'clock meeting. Now I will say, that I've always loved and laughed when I watch programs where the woman complains that their husband doesn't do things "the right way" when it comes to their kids, because I actually find those "wrong things" cute, #1 because he offers, #2 he is trying, and #3, my philosophy is do it yourself if you're going to complain!  So as we are exchanging our daughter, I laugh to myself as she's walking toward me with her messy hair, in her mismatched outfit that's too small and not warm enough for the weather! BUT, the good thing is, she must've been warm because daddy damn-near brought her entire bedroom set, pillow, blanket and all!!! But the very best part of this story, hubby said, "I didn't even have time to fix my hair! It doesn't even have gel in it!" As I get in the car and am driving home, I laugh to myself when I think about him not having time to slap some gel in his hair.

For those of you that know me, here's my hair without product:

Here's an idea of my husband's few strands that require gel!!!

LOL. I just thought it was hysterical given he gives me hell about not getting ready fast enough with toddler in tow. I'll make sure he has an extra hour next time to gel that hair!!!

Love you Chris, and thank you for all your help and everything you do!!!

Marijuana Mammas

Because this is a sensitive subject, and I am venting my view given recent discussions in the news, my disclaimer goes like this: I don't care one way or the other if people use marijuana. But, if my daughter ever suffered from severe epileptic seizures or any other trauma that may be helped by way of marijuana use, I will do anything to help her. 

As a Colorado native that recently moved to Kansas, I am surprised at some of the controversies surrounding the use of marijuana. Perhaps its because I'm used to a more liberal demographic in Colorado, versus the Republic of Kansas! I will say, I got a good laugh streaming the Denver news and watching yesterday's 420 cloud of smoke fill the Colorado air in front of the Capitol, in celebration of April 20 aka '420' to marijuana enthusiasts. And while I've never had a desire nor used an illegal substance, I do consume my share of adult beverages, and am fairly neutral in my beliefs surrounding marijuana use; to each his own!  What I will say as I watched the news recently, is that I am appalled at some of the penalties imposed on parents whose (in my opinion) only crime is educating their children, and doing the best they can to medically care for an ailing child. 

In a country that boasts about freedoms yet takes away the very same liberties that were handed to us in the first place, I cannot believe that a Kansas mom  lost custody of her 11 year old son because he gave a speech in school about the use and benefits of cannabis oil. His mother suffered from Crohn's Disease, and she authored and became a motivational speaker regarding the benefits of cannabis oil used to treat her disease, and because her child gave a speech about the very same topic, child welfare removed him from home. Now I understand there is a fine line when it comes to children and marijuana use. And I understand the initial concern teachers may have about the child speaking in detail about this topic. I also understand that  regulation is necessary to protect people. But what ever happened to schools allowing freedom of speech, and allowing kids to write, discuss and debate controversial topics? Schools punish kids for not doing their work, yet they punish them for completing an assignment?! That's ludicrous! This child gave a speech so compelling and controversial that it's raised a nationwide discussion. I am disgusted that we live in a society where jails are flooded with people that sell dope, then the government legalizes and sells it?! Yet the mere discussion of legalized drugs and their benefits tear children from homes and put them into foster care??! How can we live in a society that punishes the innocent, and criminals -- our own government -- roam free? How do repeat drug addict parents maintain custody of their kids, while textbook parents seeking the only help they can find for their severely epileptic child are battling for custody of their ailing kids? While I certainly don't advocate the abuse of drugs, and I definitely don't agree with parents using around their kids, I will say that if my daughter ever suffered from epileptic seizures and the option to help her is medical marijuana, I would ensure her safety and well-being. 

To the naysayers and "regulators," how would you react if your child suffered in the same ways some of the autistic and epileptic children? What if rather than constant prodding and poking, pill after pill, doctor visit after treatment, the never-ending pain seen in your child's face was found in one ounce of weed?  I was impressed and very touched by some of the stories shared by the Facebook group MAMMA (Mother's Advocating Medical Marijuana for Autism). While I am not a board certified doctor, I, like many other women consider myself doctor-mom and mom's first priority is our child. A parent's intuition can do a hell of a lot better for our kids, than some of the misdiagnoses, pill advocating and invasive treatments recommended by many licensed physicians. What I will say, is that I can't imagine that so many moms joining these communities and forums would actually try to harm their children, and would refuse to exhaust other avenues before considering marijuana. Perhaps I don't have the full story on the Kansas Mom and son, or even all the other matters, but I will say shame on our system for putting a child in the foster system  because of a well-told book report and speech, and for punishing the child and parent for seeking the much needed treatment that actually works. 

That's all for reading my tirade! 

-OzzyMommy

Visit our website ozzybaby.com or email ozzy@ozzybaby.com. 

My OMG Moment of the Week: TGIF

So I had to share this story with everyone, because I can't be the only parent this has experienced this! 

So baby Layla and I finish our stroll through the park and she started to fall asleep in the stroller within one block of home. So I'm doing everything to keep her awake to get her in the crib, so she'll actually sleep for an hour or so. We arrive home, I get her into the crib, and of course she's wide awake wanting to play. I decide to ignore her attempts for my attention, and leave her alone in the crib in hopes she realizes she's still sleepy. I start making some lunch, when I hear silence. Nothing but beautiful silence! So I'm thinking, "Good, she finally went to sleep." Then I hear a little commotion and think, "She can't possibly still be awake. She should be exhausted." I tip-toe to the door to listen, and I hear her moving around. But not the typical she's asleep moving around. It's the I'm up to something noise. 

So I crack open the door to peek inside, and find her looking dead at me smiling, and she says all proudly, "POOP!" with mustard yellow diarrhea diaper in hand, butt naked, poop streaks on her face, arms, and poop all over her crib! As the stench hits me in the face, I'm horrified, and rush to turn on the bath water. Happy Friday everyone!!! 

-OzzyMommy

Please visit our website ozzybaby.com or email ozzy@ozzybaby.com.

Don't MAKE Me Discipline Your Kids

In an era where school teachers are afraid to call home and report a child's misbehavior for fear of parent backlash, to restaurant owners and nail & hair salons outright banning children from their establishments, we are in a time where kids are behaving badly and no one is holding them accountable. The question at hand: Is it okay to correct other people's children?

I found myself having this conversation with a girlfriend whose parenting style is very similar to mine. But as she told me about the instance that occurred with her this past weekend, my reaction was completely opposite of hers. She was angry that a store clerk told her children to stop sampling candy as opposed to alerting her first, so she could discipline them. It prompted a dialogue that led to this blog. I believe it's okay (and in some instances beneficial) for your child to be disciplined by someone else. There are general instances that warrant others saying something to my child for behaving badly, particularly when I don't witness the behavior. To be clear, this blog is addressing verbal discipline only, and my view in circumstances where kids are behaving badly goes like this: if you're not going to say something to correct your child's behavior, then I might. For example, if your child is making it unsafe for my child or other children; if your child is exceptionally rude, annoying and loud in public, I feel it's okay for a stranger to offer correction.

As parents, it's our responsibility to correct the behavior of our child, but we're not going to be there 100% of the time. So if another adult steps in to regulate, why not? It takes a village. There's a reason that establishments have started putting signs on doors that read "No children allowed." And while I don't believe in parent-shaming (all the time), I certainly frown upon parents that ignore or reward bad behavior as though it's a phase. Those "phases" and lack of boundaries create failures in life, and while you can't predict whether or not a child is truly a "bad seed" (e.g. Hitler, Charles Manson, etc.), allowing other parents to say something to correct misbehavior shouldn't be an issue. Hell, I'm going to say something eventually if your kid is acting a hot mess and disturbing my peace. The one caveat that needs to be taken into account is when parents are at least trying. I think the general public and other parents can relate to various instances when we simply can't control the tantrum (e.g. the terrible two's), but trying to, makes all the difference to onlookers. For instance, the parents who bring a baby on an airplane. Everyone's dreading it. No one wants to sit next to you. But the key is the effort taken to hush baby or toddler when s/he cries, versus ignoring it. The attempt to correct a situation is what matters, and when everyone sees that despite all efforts, the parent simply cannot console or prevent the behavior, others sympathize.

This is a controversial topic and I understand not everyone will agree with my take. However, sometimes a stranger correcting our kid(s) is the dose of medicine needed to shatter their pride. Your child will likely be embarrassed and at the same time shocked that someone else saw them behave that way, and in the same way, it should also awaken something in the parent, if the child's bad behavior in public is a regular thing and noticed by others. It's a way to reflect. And with that, I'll leave you with a few instances where I have -- and I will again -- say something to your kid if you won't!

• Playground étiquette: If all the kids are trying to come down the slide and your kid keeps trying to walk up the slide and you won't say anything to him/her to prevent the others from getting injured, then I will. Don't get mad at me, because you won't discipline your child, when every other parent in the park is waiting for you to say something.

• Restaurants: Don't bring your screaming kid to a quiet or fancy restaurant to ruin everyone else's romantic or happy hour evening. In this scenario, no one cares if you're trying to quiet your kid. You have five minutes to control your child, or I'm saying something, because there are a million other restaurants to take antsy children where no one would notice them screaming, and they'd enjoy themselves without disturbing everyone else, not-to-mention you'd be more at ease. So don't steal others' enjoyable evening, especially when I paid for a babysitter myself to avoid situations like yours!

• Nail & Hair Salons & Spas: All of these should be kid-free, unless your child is of an age where they understand that it's quiet time and you sit until mommy is done. Don't ruin the serenity and relaxation for everyone else, or I will, and I repeat, I WILL say something to your child if you don't catch my evil eye hint the first two times I gave it to you. Everyone paid for a RELAXING  experience, and we need you and your bad kids to beat it!

• Coughing/Sneezing: If your child is a tween or older and coughing and sneezing without covering their mouth or turning their head, that's just nasty. No one wants to see those little germ particles fly their way. Teach your kid to cover their mouth or turn their head away from folks, because I don't want to be hit by slobber.

• Bumping into people or blocking areas: If your child is racing and running to a door or an elevator almost knocking people down, someone should correct that behavior. If they're taking up the entire aisle in the grocery store, but they see someone is trying to get past with their basket and they won't move, if you as a parent are standing there and won't say something to your child, someone needs to, and it might be me!

I saved this last one because I loathe parents that expect the world to accommodate their child in situations where they've got to be kidding me! Parents should be held accountable first and foremost for their actions, if not, it may lead others to speaking up about the bad behavior.

• The local bar: Years ago, as a few friends and I went to happy hour and were sitting at the bar watching some guys shoot pool, a few parents and a little league team entered and sat at a table in the pool room.  About an hour went by, when one of the moms sternly said to one of the guys that had been drinking and shooting pool, "Could you and your buddies watch your language? There are kids in here." To the guy's shock and amazement, he replied, "You brought them to a fu@k!ng bar!!! Why don't YOU leave?!" Needless to say, I think she stood corrected. Don't make anyone discipline you, or your kids! #Lessonlearned

-OzzyMommy

Please send your comments to ozzy@ozzybaby.com and visit our website at ozzybaby.com

Free Food for Tax Day

It's tax deadline day, and for those of you that have already filed, good for you. For you procrastinators scrambling to get everything together to meet today's deadline, or you're gearing up to file an extension, fear not, free food is here to get you through this stressful time!!! There's nothing better than a good deal, discounts, and free food to satisfy your stress levels. Here are some places giving away tax day treats. Enjoy.

• Sonic is giving away 1/2 price cheeseburgers all day
• McDonald's Big Macs & Quarter Pounders are buy one get one for a penny.
• Burger King Whoppers are buy one get one free
• Bonefish Grill is offering $10 off your purchase. Click this link to claim the offer 
• Boston Market has buy one meal get the second free
• Great American Cookie is giving away a free sugar cookie
• Hard Rock Cafe is giving away a free meal if you sing for it!
• Olive Garden has buy one get one free from a select menu
• Outback Steakhouse offers a steak dinner and you can get 15% off at checkout with this coupon through May 3.

Sex After Baby

Sex After Baby? In the words of my sarcastic husband, "What sex?!"

To begin, congratulations on the birth of your child. You may or may not be ready for sex, because you and your partner have some fears of whether or not it will be the same, or you're concerned about being completely healed.  I assure you that you can have great sex after pregnancy.

Womens' libido postpartum varies from person-to-person, and while I'm sure I speak for most women when I say that I have no problem climbing into bed with my husband (to sleep or out of sheer exhaustion), getting your groove back is a separate matter! The concern for both partners is very real. Will it be painful? Is she fully healed? If you're nursing, how hot or not are leaking breasts?! Or the big question: What if I get pregnant again? All of these are valid questions and concerns, and the key to easing back into sex is communicating with your partner, as well as educating yourself. Here are 7 tips for easing back into sex postpartum.

1. First and foremost, make sure you've gotten the green light from your practitioner. This typically occurs within six weeks, but varies on whether or not you gave birth vaginally or via C-section. Also, women know their body. So if you feel like your body is ready to get it on sooner, then go for it!
2. Just do it! You have to test the waters before diving in, and to rekindle that fire, it's necessary to have sex in order to determine what hurts, what feels good, and perhaps what changes have occurred in order to mix up positions.
3. A glass of wine and some lube can do the trick. It can be difficult for a women post-pregnancy to want to ease back into sex given body changes. To help unwind and prevent tensing up, there's nothing like a glass of wine and some lube to help slide right in!
4. Romance and compliments. In the words of #Patti Stanger of Millionaire Matchmaker, "Women fall in love between their ears. If (men) don't speak (and romance), we can't feel juicy-goosey downstairs," and therefore have no desire for sex.The key to easing her back into sex is making her juicy-goosey! Saying something obnoxious or frustrating is NOT going to turn her on, and will ultimately rule sex out for that evening, especially since the sleepless nights, leaking breasts, and having to make time to figure out when to shower isn't making her feel sexy. Taking the time to compliment and/or make her feel appreciated and sexy is critical in getting her to want to have sex again. 
5. Experiment - This goes back to what feels good and what doesn't. So many changes have taken place in her body, that positions that used to work, may not work anymore. Find positions that put less pressure on areas that may have been stitched or are painful, and take it slow. 
6. Communicate - You have to remember that the woman typically dictates when to sex will take place, but it's important to ensure that your partner feels wanted as well. After all, they've had to wait six weeks -- or more -- too, and they are counting down the days ladies, so get ready for them to pounce! Taking time to fulfill each other's needs is critical. 
7. Date Night - Make time for each other. Once the baby is born, your life will change, as everything is centered around your new little being. Taking time at least once a month (preferably weekly) to unwind as parents without baby is crucial to your sanity. It's also necessary so that the primary caregiver has some time to enjoy the presence of another adult without baby, to maintain some adult interaction. Date night is one of the most important factors in our relationship, as it gives us the ability to communicate, to enjoy each others company, and keeps that special romance ingredient alive.

#ParentingFails! - Funny Pix of Your Kids

I hope everyone had a wonderful Easter holiday. We are back from Colorado, where coloring eggs, visiting grandparents, and all the chocolate and jelly beans one could desire left us exhausted! Along with snapping loads of family photos (primarily of the little one), I found myself sharing laughs of some hilarious photos that are clear cases of how not to parent! As I'm sure my Facebook friends know, I am that mom that loves taking photos of baby Layla, food, date nights etc. Fortunately, I am not the only mom that enjoys this, and located several other sites as well as parents that have shared with me some of their shameful parenting moments aka realities of parenthood.

As I scrolled through my camera history, I can't help but laugh at some of the pictures captured, and think to myself #parentingfail. Here are some of the favorites I found from the internet. Enjoy!

Photos shared via Dear Baby XO & Dailymail.co.uk