Meltdowns: Child & Parent

When your child is screaming at the top of their lungs because he or she doesn't get what they want, it's tough trying to prevent or end their meltdown, but even harder keeping yourself from having one.

Tantrums seem to be more of a power struggle than anything else, and given there's limitation on how much a two year old can verbalize, lashing out and screaming is their way of communicating frustration.  And while I have some tactics that work (they don't always work), I've talked with many parents who've confided that after their own sadness, anxiety, and then ultimately yelling at their child, they've locked themselves into the bathroom for a good cry. I'm no stranger to giving myself and daughter a timeout at the same time, I ultimately believe there's nothing wrong with putting your child in their crib to cry it out, so that you can go cry it out as well. Get yourself together without your child seeing it. We're human, and parents don't always have the answers. Managing tantrums is no easy feat, but here are some of the tactics I've found successful:

• Ignore It - Although this can be hard, especially when your child is screaming at the top of their lungs and all you want is some peace and quiet, giving your child some space and ignoring the bad behavior is a way for them to reflect and realize that maybe it doesn't bother mommy and daddy as much as I thought. Watch how easily the bad behavior can dissipate. 
• Give Your Child Some Space - This goes hand-in-hand with the aforementioned. Giving both yourself and child a time out by sitting them in their crib or a safe area until they calm down is a great way for you both to de-stress. 
• Distraction - The art of distraction is key to averting bad behavior. As they begin to exhibit bad behavior, show them a toy, turn on the tv or simply make up something to capture their attention. Tell them you thought you heard an airplane in the sky and walk outside to look and see if there's a bird, a plane, or anything in the sky to avert their behavior! It works like a charm. 
• Discipline - This goes without saying, but when your child has a meltdown, make sure there are boundaries in place to try and regulate their behavior.
• Food, Rest & Relaxation - This is something that can benefit all parties. A delicious big meal is a great way to nourish the body and mind, and a full belly many times leads to a desire to rest and relax. There's nothing like a good meal to prompt nap-time. 

-Leslie Osmond

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